The day I brought my son home from the hospital, after a week long NICU stay, I decided my anxiety was far to bad to allow him to sleep alone. So I decided to let him sleep with us in my bed. I even bought a thing that was hard around three sides and had a flat mattress like pad in it so that I wouldn’t roll on him.
Two years later, after a 94 day NICU stay, my daughter came home. Now she was still on oxygen and monitoring devices so letting her sleep in the bed was not an option. However, Dj was still sleeping with me and when I moved to my condo eventually Peanut made her way to the bed too.
During a brief break up with their father I had gotten them to the point where I could put them to sleep and carry them to there own beds but it still required them to start in my bed. I literally had to go to therapy to get over the anxiety of them going to bed crying because mom was making them go to bed alone and they are in there own bed.
Now that they are seven and eight they go to bed on there own and sleep in there own room. I must admit it’s pretty nice. Wonderful feeling stretching out across your bed and not having a toe up your nostril. Being able to have the covers to myself and the fan on full blast is a little slice of heaven.
Since I’ve moved back home it’s more often than not, that at least Peanut will come crawling into my bed. Today she came around two in the morning, bright eyed and bushy tailed. Like little girl I have to be up in three hours and so do you. If you follow me you know I downsized to a twin in order to have more space in my room. So I have no clue how she thought my fat behind and her wild sleeping tail were going to fit.
I cherish these moments though. The moments I wake up with toes in my face and a whole kid laying across me. I may be tired but I know these moments will become fewer as the years go on. I know the sleepless nights won’t be because I have two kids fighting in there sleep to be next to me. So today as I barely make it through work and an endless array of chores, I have to stop and be thankful for the nights like these. Plus I have plans for revenge as they grow older.