Single Mom

Mom Down Day 3 (I think) 

I have no idea what viral bacteria streptococcus mess has made its way through this house but I’m over it. I’ve physically been down and out for the past three days… I think. I’ve lost track of it. Today I guess I have to push through and start trying to act like I feel better. 

Single mom survivor kit (Cold and Flu edition) 

  1. Lysol (Spray and Wipes) 
  2. Tylenol Cold and Flu (Day and Night) 
  3. Light Jacket
  4. Lots of Water

I promise those four things have been a life saver. It’s literally 80 degrees and I have on a jacket due to the 102 fever. The Tylenol cold and flu has a wonderful taste for when you can’t swallow so it takes two or three tries to get the pills down. The water is obvious, a hydrated mom is a happy mom! Lysol is obvious too gotta get rid of whatever it is. 

With all that being said Let me get up and wash these sheets, bleach and Lysol the bathroom and get back to being super mom. 

Stay Healthy 


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It’s the small Victories! 

When my kids father and I were together and things got bad my children were there for most of it. Every tear, fight and door slam they were there. However, sober dad was real great and he had a bond with our son like no other. So when I finally had enough and we broke up it affected Dj differently than it did the girls. For the last 3 years between the last stage of the relationship and us not being together at all, Dj has struggled emotionally and his grades at school reflect that struggle. 

Dj is behind his grade slightly and because of it his confidence has wavered. In 1st grade I reached out to the school but felt pushed to the side. Last year his 2nd grade teacher reached out to me and we started a long process of evaluations, interventions and coaching sessions to try and catch him up. 

This year has been difficult. Dj has gone through an emotional rollercoaster, from us moving back to my dads and him not seeing his dad. But my boy has not given up. He has an IEP plan and we have buckled down on the books, downloaded apps and we have succeeded!!! 

This is the text I received from his teacher today! I am so proud. He came from behind and is now ahead. This is a tremendous achievement and if you could’ve seen his face it would’ve melted your heart. He worked hard and deserves this. After so many trying times and disappointments it’s the small victories that make a tremendous difference. 

We had to celebrate for him today. Took him to CiCi’s pizza and bought him a new toy. This isn’t the final test to show where his grade is going to stand or the end of grade test, but it is a small victory. I’m so excited and proud of him. It’s great to see his smile coming back. I love this journey of growth we are on and I know it’s going to be hard but these small victories let me know that I am on the right track.


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Creating my own space

About six months ago I hit rock bottom. It was time to renew my lease on a home I already was struggling to pay rent in and of course they wanted to increase the rent by about 100 dollars. My car was destroyed on the inside, thanks to an altercation with my kids father, and needed several hundred dollars worth of work. I was behind on payments and up for tag renewal. So with all that going on I decided to swallow pride and asked to move back to my dads house. 

Since we have been living here it has been a struggle trying to find my own little space to make my own. There are three adults and two, sometimes four, kids living here. The entire house is dedicated to my kids and I definitely wouldn’t want to rearrange a space that’s my Step Mom’s. Needless to say I have made my nest under Elsa sheets, Princess Sophia Curtains and a twin bed on the floor in the corner of my daughters room. 

Don’t get me wrong I’m beyond grateful for any space in the house. Put me on a couch I’m good, but I needed a ME space. A space where I can just relax and vibe out, especially on days where Depression sits on my shoulder. My step mom, whom we call BooBoo, is completely for a redecorating project so yesterday I did just that!! 

It’s nothing special. I spent altogether about $200 dollars. I bought two nightstands (the most expensive items) bed rails and a nice bed spread. Rearranged what I could in “My Room” and Voilà! I have a small slice of heaven. It’s not much but I finally have my ME space. It’s my corner of the world to meditate, study, write and snuggle with my Lovebugs, and I still have my Sophia curtains per Peanuts request!  It’s my Balance amongst the Hysteria! 

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Making Memories on a budget

Discovery Place Offers Great discounts for families

As a single parent creating memories with my kids is something that is extremely important to me. Until recently it used to cause me great anxiety, because I’m broke. Literally! I work two jobs (52 hours a week or more). What kind of memories can I create if I don’t have any money, or time? I remember growing up traveling to Florida to visit my grandparents, Disney World, going to the theme park in our city, sporting events and going to the movies. How can I create these type of memories with my kids on my budget and time constraints?

     Then one day laying on the couch with my Peanut I realized we were making memories and it wasn’t costing me a dime. It was an ephifany and it changed my views on my interactions with my kids completely. I now see every moment as a chance to bond.

     You can create bonding moments and memories in any situation. Think back to your childhood some of the best memories aren’t because of the cost of the event, but the way you felt at the time.   Something as simple as cooking, washing clothes, swimming, fishing or laying on the couch talking can create a lifetime of memories.

Here are some of things my kids and I do to create memories:

  • Reading- My daughter loves to read, my son not so much, however if you buy a book written my Anna Dewdney called “Llama Llama mad at mama” it seems to spark his interest. We also downloaded some great are apps with wonderful books. Reading to them or letting them read to me it sparks conversation and creates memory.
  • Spa Night- Spa night I enjoy tremendously. It’s a chance for us to bond while looking crazy in a mud mask, soaking our feet, doing hair and talking about whatever our hearts desire. Even my son enjoys soaking his feet and picking at his sisters mud mask.

    Spa Night with Mya!
  • Fishing- I hate fishing!! With a passion! The bugs, the fish, the worms, tangled lines, just everything! My son loves it. He has developed his dads love of the sport, so since its free I try to take him sometimes. The fact I don’t like it and it’s always a disaster is probably what makes for the best memory. The stories they will tell when I’m gone about the cursing and mess I make will make for a great laugh.

    Gon’ Fishin
  • Cooking Dinner- I never looked at dinner or any meal as a bonding moment. It’s just something that has to be done. I would like for my children to know how to cook so I let them help every now and then. The other day DJ asked me if he could cook the sweet chicken again because that was fun, and it dawned on me I’ve made memories. Just doing everyday things I’ve created a lasting memory. The chicken was delicious too. 
  • Household chores- Random daily tasks have often wound up being some of our greatest bonding moments. Washing clothes, making the laundry soap, loading the dishwasher or cleaning up. Turn on some music and dance your way through the household chores. Club YouTube has always been my favorite way to laugh make a fool of myself while creating memories with my babies.

Creating memories on a budget is easier than I thought. Although I would like to be able to take my kids on a trip every year or buy those season passes, being a single mom with no financial help it’s hard. So I’m thankful for the times we do get to go somewhere fun but I’m blessed to have the everyday moments that seem minuscule but will be the memories my children carry for a life time.


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Hello world!

Welcome to Balanced Hysteria.  This is my first attempt at blog writing so please bear with me.  My name is Victoria ( I am sure you know that by now).  I am a 29 (almost 30) year old single mother of two children.  My son DJ is eight and my daughter, Peanut is what I call her, is six.  Before them I acquired their sisters as my step daughters and even though I am no longer with their father, whom I refer to quit often as the donor, they are still my girls and I am very active in their lives.  The oldest, Mya, is 17 and last but certainly not least is Dinesty who is 12 years old.  My four kids and I love every moment of being their mother (step), even when they are being jerks.

I am new to the single life.  I have been with their father since I was 19 years old.  Now I am knocking at 30 and having to start life all the way over.  I lost my house, my car, and pretty sure my sanity a few months ago and packed my babies up and moved back home! (yea I did that) I wallowed in self-pity and depression for few months, but have since decided that life doesn’t stop moving just because your relationship failed.  I still have kids to take care of and the relationship, unfortunately, the relationship ended for them as well.  So with my new improved attitude and happy meds we are beginning a journey to finding the balance in the hysteria!

I am looking forward to this new chapter in my life and can’t wait to share it with the world.  I am an over-sharer so by the time you get through a complete month with me I am sure you’ll feel like you have known me all my life.  I am not a great writer and have the tendency to write like I am talking to you.  So if you have any comments, questions, concerns, or suggestions please feel free to share them with me.  I have my contact information listed ( I hope) all over the page.  I love to talk to everyone, discussions make me happy, so I will be super interactive.

Thank you for taking the time out to check out my site and read my post! I look forward to this journey!

~ Victoria~




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